Tuesday, March 21, 2006

Whiny Kids Grow Up to be Republicans

A new study finds that whiny disagreeable kids grow up to be Republicans. That doesn't surprise me. Republicanism is basically the unhappy politics of selfishness. Like I've been saying for years and years, we need some quality parenting classes in our high schools.

With good parenting, we wouldn't have any Republicans. Heh.

At the risk of sounding like a braggart, I'd just like to say that all my children are bleeding heart liberals. Yeah, no whiners!

According to the study, whiny insecure kids grow up to be "rigid" Republicans who follow "traditional gender roles" and are "uncomfortable with ambiguity." That's about as good a description of Bushie as you can find.

And liberals? "[C]onfident, resilient, self-reliant kids" mature into liberals, or "bright, non-conforming adults with wide interests."

And this is not the first study to conclude that miserable children turn into conservatives.

Just think, the whiny insecure kids you save today will grow into the mature liberals of tomorrow. How does that song go? Mama don't let your kids grow up to be...

If you enjoyed hearing about this conservative bashing study as much as I did, it's pretty clear you aren't making any Republican friends today, so you may as well go on over to Another Goddamned Blog and enter this contest: How Can You Tell When a Republican is Dead? (Via Alice at 10,000 Monkeys and A Camera)